| When we analyze our relationships and how we feel | | | | together but in reality many people have relationships |
| about them we may find that we are either less than | | | | or affairs outside their marriage or partnership. |
| thrilled with the way things are or we are ecstatic | | | | Although they may indeed intend to maintain the |
| about how things are going. The difference may | | | | primary relationship few would consider them to be |
| hinge on several things, one of which is the | | | | loyal or faithful partners. |
| commitment we feel toward our relationship. | | | | Friendship First |
| How Does Commitment Develop? | | | | As usual I will again stress that every relationship |
| Let's face it; some of us are serious minded | | | | should be built on a solid foundation of friendship. |
| individuals. Even from the start we may immediately | | | | That will ensure that each partner learns about the |
| feel a sense of commitment to a new friend or | | | | other and that there is an element of respect, |
| relationship. This may be due to our upbringing or it | | | | understanding, and trust. Relationships must be strong |
| could be because we really want commitment in | | | | enough to endure all that life will through at it, the |
| return for our own efforts. | | | | foundation built of friendship will be a solid platform to |
| Some people have a difficult time opening up to | | | | draw the required strength from. |
| other individuals. When such a person is involved in a | | | | Because you learn about your friend before the |
| relationship problems can result. The partner may feel | | | | romance develops you will have a better |
| a lack of commitment exists when in reality it does | | | | understanding of his or her behaviors. In other words |
| not. The partner that has difficulty sharing information | | | | this is taking a proactive approach to building a great |
| may simply have trust issues that have resulted from | | | | relationship. During you early relationship you should |
| unpleasant past experiences. | | | | gain an understanding of the level of commitment |
| Time, patience and understanding will be keys to | | | | your partner is willing to give and what he or she |
| learning about your partner and what may be | | | | expects from you. |
| impacting on his or her behaviors. Lack of | | | | These conversations allow you the opportunity to |
| commitment is often related to a fear of being hurt. | | | | determine if this person has the same thoughts and |
| Before going any further I should say that | | | | ideas related to issues that are important to you. At |
| commitment and loyalty are not always the same | | | | the same time that you are learning about your |
| thing. For example, you may be dedicated to making | | | | partner you will be building bonds that will likely help |
| a relationship last but you may not plan to be faithful. | | | | to develop a stronger commitment. It's a win-win |
| I know that sounds like the two cannot work | | | | situation! |